People are difficult

Oct 31

I think something has shifted for me.  One of the reasons I was drawn to engineering was that, relative to interactions with humans, engineering was deterministic.  With a significant time investment engineered systems are ultimately understandable.   People, and systems of people, just aren’t that way.  Even economics is shifting to deal with the messiness that is humanity with behavioral economics.  I am currently reading “The myth of the rational voter” which deals with the subject.  “Influence” by Cialdini and “Stumbling on happiness” by Gilbert were a good insights as well.  For a glimpse at some of the pop psychology relative to the topic, there are some good TED lectures at: 

http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_ariely_asks_are_we_in_control_of_our_own_decisions.html

http://www.ted.com/talks/steven_pinker_on_the_myth_of_violence.html

http://www.ted.com/talks/philip_zimbardo_on_the_psychology_of_evil.html

Perhaps I will make more progress on my willingness to deal with things I don’t have much hope of ever fully understanding.  I consider the world of people I interact with.  The world I live in is full of engineers and businessmen and rather rational, honest, intelligent people.  It is easy to forget that there is a world of people that don’t occupy that sphere in character-space.  I consider how inept I am when people lie to me, or try to manipulate me or intimidate me or otherwise take advantage.  Most of my strategy thus far has been to work to not have to interact with such people.  I must say I think it has worked well. 

At times you meet people that live in a different sphere, tutoring at the jail, or playing bar gigs in a bad part of Denver at 2 in the morning.  Beyond dealing with those people, there are occasions where you wish you could help them.  Give them some advice on a tricky situation or how to deal with difficult people in their life.  I don’t have much to offer.  But if I want to understand the messy thing that is humanity, it seems like you need t understand the other half better.  Aside from limited forays like tutoring at the jail, or being in bars late on the sad side of town, I suppose reading pop psychology is an easy way to try to get a better understanding of the interactions of people.  I still don’t really have a desire to have any additional drama in my own life, but I am interested in understanding.  People are fascinating beings.

It has been fun to try to discuss politics and economics and psychology with people from Argentina, France, Japan, Guatemala, and Mexico over the last few months despite the language issues.   In fact, it has more value than the diving or language lessons that drew me to those places.  It is a tough vantage point to get to, but I would really like to understand how Americans and America is viewed around the world.  The educated people I talk with shade their stereotypes and motivations as we both attempt to present ourselves as rational people. 

I get that people resent the rich powerful country.  I get that people would like their country to be more rich and powerful.  I get that people who perceive problems in their country would like to believe they are attributable not to problems with their own culture but to a culpable outside force.  And it is true… the dates and types of revolutions each country undergoes shapes them.  The American government has played an opaque and disturbing role in some of these countries.  However, most of the non-Americans I am apt to meet have talked to more than one American and see us as individuals.  Many people are willing to separate the people from the government of a people’s country.  Although I think that may be part of their lens in Latin America where there have been dictators until relatively recently.  By comparison, the American government represents the people much more closely.

I see that people bring the history of their country and culture as a lens with which to view America and Americans and but so far, I haven’t been able to get a better sense of the astigmatism I know exists in my own lens.  (See the ego blog entry)  I can feel it coming on though.  Perhaps there will be more insights here to come.

I also am hoping that writing will be a larger part of what I do going forward.  This blog is something of a practice field.   Constructive comments are welcome either here or by email.